Where the Spirit of the Lord is. . .

there is freedom. -2 Corinthians 3:17

I've been meditating and thinking about this verse for a couple of days. Or actually singing it in my head. I get a unique pleasure out of discovering the verse in the bible that matches a favorite song of mine. I think the first time I remembering it happening was with Jars of Clay and not only their group title but also some of their songs. That also comes in 2 Corinthians. Chapter 4. This phrase is the start to a song on a Hope College Chapel CD. The first time I went to Hope College in Holland, Michigan was on a recruiting trip in the winter of '04 for summer staff. It had been a long week and Hope was towards the end. I had heard all about their chapel service and it lived up to my expectations. I too attended a religious affiliated institution, and being out in the secular world I often hunger for the joy of praise & worship events of college. Where I spend my time now does not break at ten o'clock without work or class for chapel services. Where I spend my time now does not stop homework and housework in the evenings to gather for singing and reflection. We do not join our arms and our hands, we do not raise them regularly for our God. And so to be able to do that fills me with all sorts of crazy joy and pleasing memories. Every year Hope puts out a CD. And of all the Christian music that I own, the CDs that I have from Hope Chapel are my favorite. So I went to daily mass yesterday morning as is my habit on Tuesdays and Thursdays before work. And the First Reading included that line: where the spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And it's hard for me to type without doing it in the rythym of the song. Verses don't usually stay with me past a day from church, but this one has. And so I'm investigating my intuition.

In context Paul is writing to the Corinthians of course, and he is talking about the veil that was placed over the Israelites in Moses' time. And the gospel then was different from the gospel that Paul preaches, that indeed we know. And we find hope in the gospel of today and the knowing differences from that in the Old Testament. The veil was taken away in Christ. So here and now, for those who know, the Spirit of the Lord is, the gospel that came in Christ. And there is freedome in that. The gift is liberty. The giver is pure love. You are free. Free of what? Of so many things perhaps.

The secular world. At bible study last night where I was only listening with my secondary skills thinking less on the topic of Galatians and rather being off in my own world back in 2 Corin. 3:17, I did hear one thing. Speaking of a pastor who is about to leave this organized life to become a missionary someone said, "She often feels broken down by consumerism." And the conformity of this world. If I had to choose a piece of 'art' to pay an exorbitant amount of money for, it would be a picture that I have never been able to hunt down and is on the inside of one of my favorite CDs. The CD is "Baez sings Dylan." On the inside is a picture of Joan and Bob when they were really young, probably taken in the early sixties. And the poster says "Protest against the rising tide of Conformity." They aren't smiling. I've seen them both in concert in recent years and they still have that spirit to them. Anyway, I resent conformity. I sometimes resent myself for falling for it. We all do, how can one escape it in this modern world? I wonder that often. On the way to work, I resent I-25. I usually do for a variety of reasons, but that is another blog. Anyway, this morning I resented how it forced us all to drive together at a certain speed, between certain lines. Now, this morning is was raining nearer to the mountains in the west. And as I veered north, I could see where the front broke. There was no conformity there. Away from all of this. . . city stuff. Corporate stuff. I usually find myself, in conditions of easing traffic, especially joyful when I get into work. I have a good song in my head and I am ready for the day. But instead I find my cubicle and my work. And I do it, quickly squashing the spirit of freedom that comes in the morning light away from this job I do for the purpose of the world. And certainly, I take small unseen initiatives in accordance for the people around me as they are God's people as well. But I work alone most often. And I resent the schedule I must keep. I resent that I cannot physically express my freedom, that it is only the secret I carry with me through my day. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy my job a lot for the most part. But.

Sometimes the world makes me color inside the lines. Taxes. Gas prices. Cars and public transportation. Groceries and landscaping companies. Clubs and memberships. Laws and government (ooh, my favorite). Neat little systems for our convenience that I hate to admit make my life easier at times. The alternative is to try and slide into something that knows no conformity. And the example I know of that is much more beautiful in my eyes, and while my conformity is numbing, this lack thereof leads to one of the worst kinds of pain- that of helplessness.